Friday, September 18, 2009


I've been flying high these last few days.

I have achieved quite a few goals recently, some of which I never thought I'd accomplish. I've:
  • exercised at least 30 minutes (sometimes up to an hour!) every day for 21 days.
  • gotten back to my post-Jack/pre-other baby weight. 
  • organized the pantry.
  • scrapbooked for the first time in forrrrever.

But I'm allowing myself to pause all of this goodness and have a terrible day. So terrible, in fact... You know the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad day? I'd like to replace some of those words with "Ridiculously Morose," "Selfishly Downtrodden," and "Oreo Cookie Outstretched."

This mood stems from the realization that 8 months is much longer than I originally thought it would be. Caleb graduates in April, and after that is the world of the Great Unknown. Uncertainty is not usually my thing, but I am quite ready to move on from the student life.

I am a College Standby, but I know that when I resume being a student, I probably won't be living the Student Life. The Cinder Block life. The People Walking Across my Balcony life. The Hearing Three Different Babies Crying When it's Completely Silent in My Apartment life. The Utah Mormon "You Must Be Apostate Because You Didn't Come to Church for Four Weeks in a Row... Oh, You Were Out of Town" life.

And now I have to wait eight whole months (or 32 weeks or 20,736,000 seconds) to get rid of all of those epithets.

I know that each phase of life presents its problems, as well as possessing particular benefits. I'm blessed to be able to put a roof over my baby's head.

But, I'm allowing myself one day to despair.


Watching Jack learn new skills has been so exciting throughout these last nine months. The rolling over, the crawling (at six months), the "cruising" (also at six months), and the standing up on his own (at eight-ish months) have all been events to cheer on and celebrate. But, I have to admit, his new nine month old skills have been the most rewarding.

When Jack walks, he puts his arms out like a zombie. His stutter step is adorable, as is his electric slide. He used to only walk when we'd call for him, but within this last week, he'll get up on his own and walk just to walk. He can span the living room length-wise and cross from the front door to the end of the kitchen. He knows that he owns it. I bet when he becomes a teenager, he'll have the same twinkle in his eyes when he walks down the hall at school. Jack is a stud.

Without thinking, Caleb and I have taught Jack to make silly sounds with his mouth. Lip-smacking, mouth-popping, tongue-clicking. And the king of all these? Rubbing his finger up and down on his lips while he vocalizes. You know, the "buh-buh-buh-buh" sound you make when describing how crazy you feel. This kid is smart, and he knows how to hone his social skills. He will be the center of attention at all of the nursery get-togethers.

And, the clapping. Oh, the clapping. You can go to Caleb's blog to see a video of Jack's masterpiece of growing up, so far.

I can't believe that he has accomplished all of this so soon.


All morning, when I've been cognizant of my incredibly overwrought state of mind, I've made the sound at the end of this youtube video. Even though Jack doesn't understand the incredibly cute things this little boy is saying, he laughs for the entire minute and 59 seconds.

1 comment:

  1. Way to go on the working out Holly! That is way better than I could ever dream of doing! I also loved the tribute to the joys of apartment living! Definitely don't miss those, especially since I now have the screaming toddler! :)