Sunday, January 29, 2012

A Tainted Morning, or Dang You Dreams


I hate waking up from a bad dream, then instantly being thrown into having to be a parent.

This morning, I woke up from a realistic dream that Caleb and I had decided to get a divorce. Lucy was crying in her crib and needed to be soothed; luckily, her morning routine is predictable, and this morning was no different. As I got her some milk and started some PBS Kids shows, I looked for concrete evidence that my split was just a dream. The house seemed to be in order, with no books thrown or counters dramatically cleared. My wedding ring was still on my finger. All appeared to be well.

In another life, I would have had that dream, woken up, and gone back to sleep to replace it with a happier dream. Erasing those subconscious feelings are much easier when you aren't changing diapers or trying to find a clean bottle.

The emotions from that dream are so raw that I am letting Caleb sleep in today while I try to shake them off. Every time this happens, I wish I were one of those people who didn't remember their dreams.

Today has started off really melancholy. That's all I'm saying.

1 comment:

  1. I had a very realistic dream a little while back that my parents were getting divorced, and I was out of sorts all day because of it. I totally feel ya!